Illustration by Alex SokolowskiYou know my firstborn, Asparagus? I call him Asparagus because of an affliction he has, called Asperger Syndrome. Asperger Syndrome (AS) is a neurobiological disorder named for a Viennese physician, Hans Asperger. Individuals with AS show marked deficiencies in social skills, have difficulties with transitions or changes and prefer sameness. They have a great deal of difficulty reading non verbal cues (body language) and very often has difficulty determining proper body space. Often overly sensitive to sounds, tastes, smells and sights, the person with AS may prefer soft clothing, certain foods, and be bothered by sounds or lights no one else seems to hear or see. [http://www.udel.edu/bkirby/asperger/aswhatisit.html]
Asparagus is the genius in our famiy. He started talking at the age of one and knew the alphabet by then. He practically taught himself how to read by the age of two and hasn't stopped reading since. When we don't know anything - and I mean any frigging thing - we would ask him and he would give a clear and concise explanation. His behaviour can seem odd or «abnormal» at times, but we have learned to shrug off his rudeness and his mood changes. When he is in a good mood, he can be extremely charming and so endearing. Apparently he is a chick magnet. It's only later on, when they discover some of his quirks, that the charm wears off.
Asparegus's birthday is coming up. Learning from past experience (I don't think I have ever bought him a gift that he liked), I asked him what he wants. His father also called me to inquire, as did his little brother BBoy. He said: «Nothing». I insisted: «There must be something. Would you like money instead?». No, he doesn't need money. He makes a relatively good salary in his programming job. Then he said: «Give the money to some charity in my name».
I was so proud. When I told his brother about his wish, BBoy was also amazed and pleased. I'm so happy with my life now: I have a good job, a nice house, good health and my children are little buddhas.
This morning, I asked Asparagus to give me some computer programme and he said yes. Then this evening, when I asked him again, he said: no. «But you said yes» I protested. He said: «I forgot».
That's life with an asparagus Buddha.
Asparagus is the genius in our famiy. He started talking at the age of one and knew the alphabet by then. He practically taught himself how to read by the age of two and hasn't stopped reading since. When we don't know anything - and I mean any frigging thing - we would ask him and he would give a clear and concise explanation. His behaviour can seem odd or «abnormal» at times, but we have learned to shrug off his rudeness and his mood changes. When he is in a good mood, he can be extremely charming and so endearing. Apparently he is a chick magnet. It's only later on, when they discover some of his quirks, that the charm wears off.
Asparegus's birthday is coming up. Learning from past experience (I don't think I have ever bought him a gift that he liked), I asked him what he wants. His father also called me to inquire, as did his little brother BBoy. He said: «Nothing». I insisted: «There must be something. Would you like money instead?». No, he doesn't need money. He makes a relatively good salary in his programming job. Then he said: «Give the money to some charity in my name».
I was so proud. When I told his brother about his wish, BBoy was also amazed and pleased. I'm so happy with my life now: I have a good job, a nice house, good health and my children are little buddhas.
This morning, I asked Asparagus to give me some computer programme and he said yes. Then this evening, when I asked him again, he said: no. «But you said yes» I protested. He said: «I forgot».
That's life with an asparagus Buddha.
www.holywell.leics.sch.uk/
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