Sunday, March 25, 2007

Friday, March 23, 2007

Pour qui voter?

Un ami (merci Fongue!) m'a envoyé ce lien, qui mène à un site où un questionnaire vous permettra de déterminer quel parti politique propose le programme qui correspond le plus à vos propres valeurs. Les résultats vous surprendront.

Thursday, March 22, 2007

The Sun Heals All

I subscribe to a site called : Brian's Predictions (

You may or may not believe, but this is Brian's instructions for healing all kinds of disease:

Brian says:
Took me some time to translate this...basically this says that our sun, or God, has the power to cure any sickness the human body has...and this is how it works:

1) On a sunny day, close your eyes and look directly at the sun.

2) Slowly count to 10.

3) Keeping your eyes closed, look for some sort of shape or symbol on you may take a while to see it...but you will...just relax and look.

4) After you have this image in memory, it says to draw what you see in your own blood on ordinary paper....I would suggest first draw it in pencil first and copy it over to blood later. Also states that you must use the blood from your left middle finger.

5) Let the blood dry and fold the paper in half (any direction)

6) Put this image under your pillow, bed or whatever you sleep this for 6 days.

(If you do not want to use blood...don't...if you do, would suggest using one of those finger prick things used to check blood sugar.)

White (Middle-Aged) Folks Can't Rap

Enough is Assez is Basta is Đũ Rồi!

The provincial election is set for March 26th. I have received the necessary forms and information about where to go, which ID documents to bring, etc.. I have read the parties' programmes, blogs, comments, editorials, etc.. so can we please STFU now? Can we please not have to go through the same arguments again? Are the Liberals the most corrupted? Is the ADQ the most regional and anti-Montreal? Is the PQ the most anti-democratic or the most honest for saying upfront that no matter what the people vote, they will keep organizing referendums after referendums until they get the answer they want? And once they get their Yes and Quebec is separated, can the No side keep organizing referendums after referendums until the separation is reversed?

In times like these, I long for good ol' despotism. At least with a non democratic regime, if you're not happy, there is hope for improvement after the despot has his head chopped off à la Louis The Sixteenth or sent packing to join his bank accounts in Switzerland à la Idi Amin. But with a democratic regime, the people is stuck with the same incessant corruption and nepotism. By electing a new bastard, we are simply changing the names on official documents, without realizing that if we are being screwed by a new Dick, we are still being screwed! You know that racist joke about a white girl having multiple sex sessions with a Chinese guy until exhausted, she looks under the bed and find a whole bunch of Chinese guys waiting for their turn. Same thing with democracy.

And don't get me started on "Reasonable Accomodations". The white majority is so insecure and so clueless that it keeps oscillating between insufferable racism, like the Hérouxville Follies ( or the Soccer Hijab Ban (, and abject abdication to ethnic/religious pressures, like with the YMCA Frosted Window Pane Follies or the Sugar Shack No Pork Follies ( What happened to common sense? Where do we draw the line?

I don't know

Update 22/3/07: Another example of reasonable accomodation: The Chief Electoral Officer has issued instructions allowing Muslim women to vote with their face completely covered under a burqa or a nijab, as long as they are accompanied by an adult who can confirm their identity. A non Muslim like myself, however, cannot vote if I don't have the proper IDs, even with a friend vouching for my identity. It is the same phenomenon as the YMCA frosting their windows to spare young Hassidic Jews the spectacle of insufficiently covered women doing yoga or pilates. Which is not too far from the practice in some countries of forcing women to stay indoors because some men might go uncontrolably horny at their sight. In other words, punish all women, rather than upsetting a few men. If any small group is inconvenienced in any way by the way of life of the majority, it is for the majority to bend itself backward and change its way of life, rather than imposing any discomfort on the small group.

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

The Story of Knut

Knut is a baby polar bear born in captivity in the Berlin Zoo. For some reason, Knut's mother rejected him and he had to be adopted and taken care of by humans. The clip below shows him in all his cuteness and glory. And now, animal rights activists are asking the zoo to kill him, because he will never be able to lead a normal polar bear life. In the wild, they say, he would already be dead.

"Raising him by hand is not appropriate to the species but rather a blatant violation of animal welfare laws," animal rights activist Frank Albrecht told the mass circulation newspaper Bild, whose front page headline Monday read "Will Sweet Knut Be Killed by Injection?"
Berlin Zoo is allowing Knut to be raised in such a way that the bear will have a behavioral disorder for the rest of his life, Albrecht believes. "In actual fact, the zoo needs to kill the bear cub," he adds.

He's not alone. Wolfram Graf-Rudolf, director of the Aachen Zoo, told the newspaper, "I don't consider it appropriate for the species that the little polar bear is being raised on a bottle." The animal will be fixated on his keeper and not be a "real" polar bear, he says. However he feels it is now too late to put Knut out of his supposed misery. "The mistake has been made. One should have had the courage to put him to sleep much earlier."

Watch him interact with his human father: it is heartbreakingly cute.

Update 22/3/07: I replaced the clip with a new one, much shorter and less repetitive.

Thank you MIT!

Via EETimes:
W. David Gardner - InformationWeek (03/13/2007 3:53 PM EDT)

In 2002, when MIT decided to experiment with placing course contents on the Web for open access, the university's officials knew they were breaking new ground and had no idea how the effort would be received.

On Tuesday, school officials revealed plans to make available the university's entire 1,800-course curriculum by year's end. Currently, some 1.5 million online independent learners log on the MIT OpenCourseWare (OCW) site every month and more than 120 universities around the world have inaugurated their own sites for independent learners. MIT has more than 1,500 course curriculums available online to date.

Who are MIT's independent learners? One MIT calculation found that 17% were educators elsewhere, 32% students everywhere, and 49% were self learners.

"About 40% of the MIT alumni population uses the site," said Steve Carson, the OCW's external relations director, in an interview Tuesday. "Usually they take courses they didn't have time for while they were students here." The courses are free of charge and no course credit is granted. Other learners come from nations all over the world, from Antarctica to Darfur. He notes that the highest traffic in the United States comes from leading high-tech states Massachusetts and California. South Korea has a sizable base, accounting for a higher number of learners than, for instance, in China, its neighbor.

Many learners are college teachers and professors, who want to sharpen their own teaching courses and methods. In a typical example, physics professor Younes Attaourti of Marrakesh, Morocco, has used MIT materials for his courses on statistical physics and quantum theory. The most popular OCW courses track the popular undergraduate curriculum at MIT. These include the introductory electronics engineering course "Circuits and Electronics," Linear Algebra, Physics 1, Introduction to Biology and the Principles of Macroeconomics.

Carson said MIT's teachers collect what they have created for their courses and make it available over the Web. Many online learners purchase text books for the courses they are monitoring and a recent MIT-Amazon link showed that about 2,000 text books were ordered by independent learners, demonstrating just how serious the learners are.

"Video and audio files are very popular," said Carson. "There are 21 courses with full video available." Typically, independent learners view videos with streaming media players and replay them on PCs, MP3s, or iPods.

The entire effort has altruistic overtones of intellectual philanthropy. MIT's Anne Margulies, executive director of the program, recently described the OCW program as knowledge "shared openly and freely. MIT is using the power of the Internet to give away all of the educational materials created here."

Other universities have joined MIT in what is becoming an international OCW movement. More than 100 mirror OCW sites have been established at universities globally. The OCW Consortium now includes many top U.S. universities including Harvard Law School, Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health, Michigan State University, Tufts University, University of Notre Dame, University of California at Irvine, and Utah Valley State College.

Many foreign universities have jumped on the OCW bandwagon. More than 30 universities in China have joined the consortium and tiny Vietnam has more universities in the consortium than the U.S.

MIT has placed its OCW program on a separate computer installation that is controlled by a modified version of Microsoft Content Management Server. Technology provided by Akamai accelerates the MIT content and protects it from surges.

For the past few years, I have been studying Mandarin on their site.

Monday, March 19, 2007

Final salvo

Moi aussi, je sais déployer la grosse artillerie! Hallali!!!!

Saturday, March 17, 2007

Duel To The Death

Not only does my foe refuse to surrender, but he dares cast aspersion on my honour («pathétique cette generation de petit joueurs», he bleated). So I have no choice but to show him this Monty Python clip, as a warning, because I am a Buddhist with compassion on top of an attitude.

Friday, March 16, 2007

Beatbox Challenge

ou en français: le challenge du beatbox. On me cherche, on me trouve.

1er crochet: Beatbox inuit
(En Inuit, ça s'appelle throat singing)

2e uppercut: Beatbox australien

Et le coup de grâce: Chu Bush

More Russell

Russell Peters - Outsourced

Thursday, March 15, 2007

Russell Peters Special Double

Dedicated to hat, one of my few readers.

The Dormitory Boys Are Back!!!1!

Yes, looks like I'm on a roll, posting three four posts in one day, but if you remember, I lost my Internet connection for a couple of months around Christmas time, and I had all these posts piled up while waiting to be reconnected.

Genius that I am, this time I manage to screw up my computer so badly the hard disk may need to be reformatted completely. So in case I will be computerless (yet again), I am putting up all the posts I've been saving.

So here's the latest from my favourite lipsynchers, the Dormitory Boys, in We will rock you... We will, we will rock you! Doom Doom Clap! Doom Doom Clap!...

And as an encore, them again, lipsynching my favourite ballad: Bu De Bu Ai

If you want more, go to their website:

The Tibetan Book Of The Dead - Part 2

via Cynical C

The Tibetan Book of the Dead: The Great Liberation (1994), narrated by Leonard Cohen

The Tibetan Book Of The Dead - Part 1

Via Cynical C

The Tibetan Book of The Dead: A Way of Life (1994), narrated by Leonard Cohen

Têt in Vietnam

TV clip about flowers and stuff in Vietnam during the Têt holidays. Strictly for orchid lovers.

Whose Life Is It Anyway?

With springtime approaching, the seal colonies will start producing pups, which means that seal hunting will start soon, if it hasn't already. We have all seen the horrific scenes of cute furry baby seals being clubbed to death in front of their mothers. Hoping to counter the protests and boycotts that are sure to come from other countries, Canada has decided to send a delegation of Inuit and New Founlanders to The Hague to defend its position.

Via Globe and Mail (
DOUG SAUNDERS - London— Aaju Peter and her teenage son Aggu made the journey yesterday from Nunavut to the Netherlands to make a point for the Canadian government, one rarely heard by Dutch protesters: The seal hunt is a good thing.

"I want to let these people know that we hunt the seals for food to eat and for coats to wear," Ms. Peter said yesterday shortly after arriving in the Netherlands. "Here in Europe, they believe a lot of myths about the seal hunt. I want to tell them that this is my way of life, my tradition, my right."

The Canadian government flew these Inuit, along with a Newfoundlander, to The Hague so they can face hundreds of activists protesting against the seal hunt today and provide their own, distinctly Canadian view to the crowd.

The stakes are high: This week's protests mark a turning point in European policy, which could end the importation of Canadian seal products and potentially harm fisheries and other Maritime exporters.

The European Union is debating a proposal to outlaw the import of seal products from Canada in all its 27 countries. Belgium has passed its own ban, and at least three other countries are following suit.

The British government has supported the proposed Europe-wide ban with a parliamentary endorsement of the animal-rights position. While global animal-rights protests have often greeted the start of the Canadian seal hunt in March, this year the issue has become especially sensitive for Canada.

If you look at it from an objective point of view, the anti-hunt protesters are not very rational. Humans should either stop killing animals altogether or they should regulate and legislate their killing to avoid cruelty and extinction. There is no moral or logical justification for sparing only the cute or beautiful (to our human eyes) animals. And I'm not even going to start on the cultural biases: foie gras = good and civilized, dog kebab = cruel and savage.

So whose life is more important anyway? Brown Inuit hunters or white European animal activists? One thing for sure, it's not the animals' life.

Repas inuit - Catherine Reisser, Laurence Quentin

And speaking of porn, here's a clip of a bird humping a cat (via World O' Crap -

Whose ear is it anyway?

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Is President Bush My Soul Mate?

Via The Huffington Post (

Tengo hambre

By Traci Carl, AP, March 13, 2007 04:43 PM EST
MERIDA, Mexico — Is anyone feeding the president?

At every stop on his seven-day, five-country Latin American trip, including here on Tuesday, President Bush has been fixated on food.

It began with Bush's first event in his first country, when he and Brazilian President Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva celebrated a new ethanol alliance. "I appreciate the fact that you're about to buy me lunch," Bush told Silva. "I'm kind of hungry. Looking forward to eating some of that good Brazilian food."

In Uruguay, at a news conference with President Tabare Vazquez, Bush said he couldn't wait to dig into some Uruguayan beef - something the tiny nation wants to sell more of to the United States. "You've told me all along how good it is, and after we answer a few questions, we're about to find out," Bush told his host, later praising the country's abundant blueberries, too.

In Colombia, part of Bush's agenda included time with locals growing crops as alternatives to the illegal coca from which cocaine is made. The vendors' stalls were filled with honey, chocolate and coffee.

Next came Guatemala, where Bush hauled some lettuce onto a truck - something he later called "one of the great experiences of my presidency." "I'm looking forward to the dinner that you're hosting for Laura and me," Bush told Guatemalan President Oscar Berger in another news conference. "I'm not going to talk too long because I might get too hungry." Later, Bush's stomach was either really growling - or it was a ruse to end the questioning. He signaled an end to the joint appearance by asking Berger what was on tap for dinner. "We have tortillas with guacamole and beans," Berger assured him.

In Mexico on Tuesday, Bush was down to business with President Felipe Calderon. Among the items on the agenda: a working lunch, scheduled for earlier in the day than locals usually dine. Bush, speaking Spanish to Mexican reporters as he started touring the Uxmal ruins, said his lunch was good. "I'm full," he declared.

So now that I discovered this charmingly human side of Bush, I asked him if he would like to go back with me to Vietnam and we'll eat our way down from Hanoi to HoChiMinh City. His answer:

Là, t'es content, KCA?

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Monday, March 12, 2007

White Folks Can't Dance


1) President Bush and his two wives (white, white and Oreo) in Sao Paulo, Brazil

2) Mr. Bean (white), in Great Britain

3) Me (not white)

I rest my case.

Saturday, March 10, 2007

The Dream Shall Never Die

Via: The Globe and Mail (

Message from the Dalai Lama [Translated from the original in Tibetan]

On the occasion of the 48th anniversary of the Tibetan people's peaceful uprising in Lhasa in 1959, I offer my prayers and tribute to all those Tibetans who have suffered and sacrificed their lives for the cause of the Tibetan people. I also express my solidarity with those who are presently suffering repression and imprisonment.

In 2006, we witnessed both positive and negative changes in the People's Republic of China. On the one hand, the hard-line position was intensified with a campaign of vilification against us, and more disquietingly, heightened political restriction and repression in Tibet.

On the other hand, in China itself, we saw some improvement with regard to the freedom of expression. In particular, there is a growing feeling among Chinese intellectuals that material development alone is not sufficient and that there is a need to create a more meaningful society based on spiritual values. Views that the present system is inadequate to create such a society are gaining ground, as a result of which belief in religion in general, and particularly interest in Tibetan Buddhism and culture, is growing. Moreover, there are many who express their wish that I make a pilgrimage to China and give teachings there.

President Hu Jintao's continued call for a harmonious society is laudable. The basis for the realization of such a society is to foster trust among the people, which can take place when there is freedom of expression, truth, justice and equality. Therefore, it is important that officials at all levels not only take heed, but also implement these principles.

With regard to our relations with China, since around 1974, realizing the inevitability of an opportunity to engage some day in dialogue with China, we have made preparations to achieve genuine, unified, autonomy for all Tibetans, as enshrined in the Chinese constitution.

In 1979, China's paramount leader Deng Xiaoping proposed that except for independence, all other issues regarding Tibet could be resolved through negotiations. As this was in accord with our thinking, we adopted a mutually beneficial, middle-way policy. Since then, for 28 years, we have consistently and sincerely pursued this policy, based on the broad objectives of addressing the immediate and long-term interests of both Tibetans and Chinese, peaceful coexistence in Asia and protection of the environment. This policy has been endorsed and supported by many pragmatic Tibetans in and outside Tibet and by many countries.

The most important reason behind my proposal to have genuine national regional autonomy for all Tibetans is to achieve genuine equality and unity between the Tibetans and Chinese by eliminating Han [the ethnic majority] chauvinism and local nationalism. This will contribute to the country's stability through mutual help, trust and friendship between the two nationalities and to the maintenance of our rich culture and language based on a proper balance between spiritual and material development for the benefit of the whole of humanity.

It is true that the Chinese constitution guarantees national regional autonomy to minority nationalities. The problem is that it is not implemented fully, and thus fails to serve its express purpose of preserving and protecting the distinct identity, culture and language of the minority nationalities. What happens on the ground is that large populations from the majority nationalities have spread in these minority regions. Therefore, the minority nationalities, instead of being able to preserve their own identity, culture and language, have no choice but to depend on the language and custom of the majority nationality in their day-to-day lives. Consequently, there is a danger of the languages and rich traditions of the minority nationalities becoming gradually extinct.

There is nothing wrong with infrastructural development such as railway in itself. However, it is a source of deep concern that ever since the railway [Tibet's first] became operational, Tibet has seen a further increase in Chinese population transfer, deterioration of its environment, misuse and pollution of its water, and exploitation of its natural resources, all causing huge devastation to the land and all those who inhabit it.

Although there has been a certain number of educated and capable Communist Party members among the people of minority nationalities, it is unfortunate that very few of them have attained leadership positions at the national level, and some of them have even been given different labels such as separatists.

In order to provide real benefits for both the majority and minority nationalities, as well as for the central and local governments, a meaningful autonomy should be put into place. Since this particular autonomy is for the minority nationalities, the demand for a single administration of the Tibetan nationality is sincere, just and transparent. It is clear to the world that we have no hidden agenda. As such, it is the sacred duty of all Tibetans to continue our struggle towards fulfilling this reasonable demand. No matter how long it takes, our courage and determination shall remain unchanged until we fulfill our aspirations.

The struggle of the Tibetan people is not about the struggle for the status of a few Tibetan individuals – it is the struggle of a people. We already have transformed the exile Tibetan administration and community into a genuine democratic system, with a succession of leaders elected for the people by the people themselves. We have thus set up a deeply-rooted, social and political institution that will carry forward our struggle from generation to generation. In the end, the ultimate decisions will be made democratically by the people themselves.

Since the resumption of direct contacts between the Tibetans and Chinese in 2002, my representatives have conducted five rounds of comprehensive discussion with concerned officials of the People's Republic of China.

In these discussions both sides were able to express in clear terms the suspicions, doubts and real difficulties that exist between the two sides. These rounds of discussion have thus helped in creating a channel of communication between the two sides. The Tibetan delegation stands ready to continue the dialogue any time, anywhere. Our Kashag secretariat will provide the details in its statement.

I greet all those Tibetans in Tibet – Communist Party members, leaders, officials, professionals and others – who have held on to the Tibetan spirit by continuing their efforts to work for the genuine interest of the Tibetan people. I express my deep admiration for their immense courage to do whatever they can in the service of the people of Tibet. I also express my deep admiration to the Tibetans in Tibet who, against all odds, have made efforts to preserve the Tibetan identity, culture and language, and for their steadfast courage and determination in realizing the aspirations of Tibetan people. I am confident that they will continue to strive for our common cause, with renewed dedication and commitment. I urge all Tibetans in and outside Tibet to work in unity for a secure future based on equality and harmony of nationalities.

I would like to take this opportunity to wholeheartedly thank the people and Government of India for their unwavering and unparalleled generosity and support to us. I also express my gratitude to all those governments and people in the international community for their concern and support of the Tibetan issue.

I offer my prayers for the peace and wellbeing of all sentient beings.

His Holiness, the 14th Dalai Lama, Tenzin Gyatso

I scream for Aisu Kareemu

I've decided to make it my mission in life to taste all the weird ice creams that are sold in ethnic grocery stores. I've already started with the safest and most common «Oriental» flavors: coconut, red beans, ginger and green tea, but now it's time to explore more adventurous territories. For example: Shark fin noodle ice cream, or Fukahire Ramen Aisu Kareemu for the connoisseurs.

Shark Fin Noodle Ice Cream

But there's many more flavors: Oyster, Spinach, Deep Sea Water, Garlic, etc..

Count Dracula's Favorite: Garlic Ice Cream

See the full list of the Wackier World of Japanese Ice Cream:

Friday, March 09, 2007

The Exorcism

Via The Huffington Post []:

GUATEMALA CITY — Mayan priests will purify a sacred archaeological site to eliminate "bad spirits" after President Bush visits next week, an official with close ties to the group said Thursday.

"That a person like (Bush), with the persecution of our migrant brothers in the United States, with the wars he has provoked, is going to walk in our sacred lands, is an offense for the Mayan people and their culture," Juan Tiney, the director of a Mayan nongovernmental organization with close ties to Mayan religious and political leaders, said Thursday.

Bush's seven-day tour of Latin America includes a stopover beginning late Sunday in Guatemala. On Monday morning he is scheduled to visit the archaeological site Iximche on the high western plateau in a region of the Central American country populated mostly by Mayans.

Tiney said the "spirit guides of the Mayan community" decided it would be necessary to cleanse the sacred site of "bad spirits" after Bush's visit so that their ancestors could rest in peace. He also said the rites - which entail chanting and burning incense, herbs and candles - would prepare the site for the third summit of Latin American Indians March 26-30.

Iximche, 30 miles west of the capital of Guatemala City, was founded as the capital of the Kaqchiqueles kingdom before the Spanish conquest in 1524.

Better use industrial strength

This reminds me of a scene in one of my favourite films "Ace Ventura, Pet Detective", where Ventura publicly humiliates Lieutenant Einhorn by demonstrating that Podacter's death was a murder and not a suicide.

Enjoying his triumph over his nemesis Einhorn, he does a little dance: Yes! Yesss! I have exorcised the demons! This house is clear.

Americans! Can't live with them, Can't kill them

The title's a joke, OK? Don't send the CIA or the cavalry after my fat ass!
A friend (thank you F.!) linked me to this YouTube clip.

Even though it is fun to laugh at other people's ignorance, I must say that I don't share what seems to be the general consensus that Americans are stupid. I mean, they are in general very parochial, self-centered and utterly comfortable with their complete ignorance about the rest of the world. But is it fair or representative to show a collection of the most stupid/uneducated people in America and imply that the American people are really that's stoopid? Of course not! Uh... Wait.... On the other hand, they did vote twice -- twice!!! -- for The Shrub .....

I don't understand either

Quote from the YouTube clip:

Q: What religion are buddhist monks?

A: Uhh.. Buddhist monks... Buddhist monks... Islamic, I don't know...

Thursday, March 08, 2007

The Indian Beatles

This is dedicated to Meiko, who loved "The Indian Michael Jackson".


Look, no one knows yet,
But my heart loves you,
My heart loves yoooooouuuuuu!

International Women's Day

Real Women (Dove campaign)

I am not celebrating Women's Day today. Or any day. It's a bit demeaning, I think, to be given one day a year where people give you a flower, pat you on the head and say "You go girl" and then it's back to the same old, same old for the rest of the year : rape, forced marriage, domestic violence, housework, less pay for equivalent work, veil, genital excision, "honour" killing, etc...

Hurry up, I need a beer

Every year, there's an idiot (hopefully, not the same one) who would ask: "And when is Men's Day?" The answer is: It's the other 364 days, asshole!!!!


Sorry, had to vent a bit... I'm ok now.

Me, Me, Me!!!

I finally figured out how to take my own picture [eyes rolling].
So here's my portrait, taken in the loo at the office.

Oops, sorry, no, that's my Halloween picture. Here's me in the loo at work:

I know, I know, not everybody can look like Mme Phi Thanh Van (see below), but I'm trying. [Not really, it looks like a lot of efforts is required].

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Nuit Blanche in Montreal

Montreal at dusk

Wintertime in Montreal can be very long and very cold, and people are easily tempted to stay indoors or to hurry home from school or work to hibernate. That's why Canadian homes are very well heated and very comfortable compared to, say, homes in Europe where you freeze in winter and roast in summer. But of course, it's not very good for the local business if people stay indoors inside their cocoons, not to mention the fact that nobody wants to boost the suicide rates that are already particularly high in Nordic countries.

Montreal at night

So, in Montreal, we try to celebrate winter with special events, like culinary festivals, sport events, and something called Nuit Blanche, where all sorts of bars, galleries and cultural spaces in the downtown area are staying open from dusk till dawn on this one night (March 3rd to 4th), «offering a kaleidoscope of fare both familiar and unusual». A lot of the best stuff don’t cost a cent - the events are free. And no, we've never had any incidents with vampires.

One of the most exciting events during this year's Nuit Blanche was a Hip Hop/Breakdance battle, called Hip Hop Insomnia, that took place inside a metro station, from 1 am to 5 am. The battle was opened to everyone, and b-boys and b-girls were battling each other. And who do you think won that Battle royale? None other than B-girl Lynx, my son Forty's girlfriend and partner! She won first prize, after smoking all the other b-Boys!

Bravo B-Girl Lynx!

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

Souffrir pour être belle

Normalement, j'ai les cheveux bleus. Pas toute la chevelure comme sur la photo, mais une bonne partie. Mon rêve de petite fille étant de ressembler à un personnage d'animé (, je me suis fait faire des mèches bleues à la première occasion et depuis, je ne peux me concevoir que comme ayant des cheveux bleus, bordel de merde.

Je vais toujours chez le même coiffeur, parce qu'il est le seul en ville à réussir la délicate opération de mélange chimique et de doigté chirurgical nécessaire pour produire exactement le bleu que je veux. C'est pourquoi, vers Noël, constatant la baisse inquiétante de sa réserve de colorants bleus, je lui rappelle d'en commander. Je suis sa seule cliente qui utilise ce colorant bleu. Normalement, il en commande 24 bouteilles à la fois, dont je paye intégralement le prix, et on se partage les bouteilles: 12 au salon réservées à mon nom, comme les bouteilles de whisky de luxe dans les bars, et 12 que j'emporte chez moi pour faire des retouches entre les visites au salon.

Mais le mec, étant un mec, me dit à chaque fois: Oui, oui, ne t'inquiète pas, je vais les commander. Vous devinez la suite: la réserve a fini par être épuisée et le mois dernier, j'ai dû annuler mon rendez-vous avec lui, parce qu'il n'avait plus de colorant bleu. Je suis allée chez un autre coiffeur qui, n'ayant pas de bleu, m'a mis un violet violent. Les amis m'assurent que cela me va très bien, mieux même que le bleu habituel, mais depuis ce temps, je ne suis plus moi-même. J'évite de me regarder dans le miroir, je ne me reconnais pas quand j'aperçois par hasard ma réflexion. C'est comme être en voyage, quand on passe d'un hôtel à l'autre: la disposition de la chambre est différente, le lit est différent, la douche est différente. Ce n'est pas inconfortable, mais on n'est jamais vraiment à l'aise.

J'essaye de me raisonner. Après tout, ce n'est que l'apparence physique, un nouveau masque à la place du masque habituel. Mais parfois, j'ai envie de faire comme Britney Spear et de me tondre complètement le crâne. Heureusement qu'il fait - 30 degrés Celsius et que cela me retient un peu.

Another personality test

You are a Man with No Name
You scored 8 Honor, 3 Justice, 7 Adventure, and 5 Individuality!

It's one thing to be a gunslinger. It's another to wander into town, leave nothing but a trail of those who'd try your skill and take the town's gratitude and cash with you. Hero or villan? It's all in how you look at it and whose side you're on.

Cigar in your teeth and colt on your hip, you are ready to step into the hazy desert horizon. You'll do just fine.

Monday, March 05, 2007

Happy Birthday to Me!

I hit the big 6-0 today!! And the whole world celebrates!!

From Iraq:

To Russia:

To a mysterious apartment with an awesome b-baby:

Sunday, March 04, 2007

The Soccer Hijab Affair and the Jan Wong Controversy

Girls just wanna have fun

MANCHESTER, England, March 3 (Reuters) - The International Football Association Board, the game's ultimate decision-making body, has backed a controversial decision to prevent an 11-year-old Muslim girl from taking part in a match while wearing a headscarf. The girl was kicked out of a game in Ottawa after she refused to comply to the referee's order to remove her hijab.

Now I don't want to comment on the referee's decision, because zillions of people have already done so. I just want to address some people's argument that the decision was not tinted with racism or bigotry because the referee was a Muslim himself. The referee's reaction is a well known phenomenon among "ethnic" people and other visible or invisible minorities.

Whenever I have to go through customs, I make a point of avoiding to stand in a line leading to an Asian/Oriental customs agent, because I know that, 9 times out of 10, that agent will be particularly strict and will give me as much hassle as possible. The reason is that non-white civil servants are so worried of being seen by their bosses and colleagues as too easy on someone of relatively the same race, that they go to the opposite extreme to prove that they are just as professional as their white colleagues. It's a variation of the saying: So-and-so is not a racist because he's an asshole with everyone.

Hum... Made in Vietnam, I see...

So maybe the Muslim referee was worried that if he doesn't make a pre-emptive move, and some jerk files a complaint or something, he'll be accused of favoring a co-religionist and he'll be fired or punished in some other ways. It's the same reaction as with these two or three Chinese people who, right at the onset of the Jane Wong Affair, hurried to write to French newspapers to claim that they have never been subjected to racism in Quebec and that they are denouncing Jan Wong for accusing pure laine Quebeckers of racism.

And that, my white friends, is the sad reality of minorities' life where you have to shit on your own people in order to avoid being shat on.

How I will Die

You'll die from an Unlikely Illness (like the plague).

You will unfortunately succumb to a random and unlikely disease. Only to find out after death that eating more broccoli would have cured you.

'How will you die?' at

Too morbid? Here's a palate cleanser: The Monty Python Argument Clinic Sketch.

Friday, March 02, 2007

Angelina Jolie to Adopt Vietnamese Child

HANOI, Vietnam - 2 March 2007 - Angelina Jolie has filed papers to adopt a Vietnamese child, the country's top adoption official said today. Jolie, 31, and Pitt, 43, made a surprise visit to Vietnam at Thanksgiving, when they visited the Tam Binh orphanage, on the outskirts of Ho Chi Minh City.


I submitted my application, but was turned down. Now we all know how these things work. All right, whom do I have to sleep with to get a break here? Him? Oh, all right. Sigh... If I must, I must.....

Bernouille fait pénitence

Puppy Butts

Bernouille is sorry for his lame joke. This post is his way of making it up to you, dear readers:

Here is the Washington Post's Mensa Invitational which once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are the winners:

1. Cashtration: The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.

2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

5. Bozone: The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high

8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

10. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

11. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

12. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

13. Decafalon: The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you

14. Glibido: All talk and no action.

15. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

16. Arachnoleptic fit: The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

17. Beelzebug: Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

18. Caterpallor: The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.

The Washington Post has also published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words.

And the winners are:

1. coffee, n.: the person upon whom one coughs.

2. flabbergasted, adj.: appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained.

3. abdicate, v.: to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

4. esplanade, v.: to attempt an explanation while drunk.

5. willy-nilly, adj.: impotent.

6. negligent, adj.: absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a nightgown.

7. lymph, v.: to walk with a lisp.

8. gargoyle, n. : olive-flavored mouthwash.

9. flatulence, n.: emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been run over by a steamroller.

10. balderdash, n.: a rapidly receding hairline.

11. testicle, n.: a humorous question on an exam.

12. rectitude, n.: the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.

13. pokemon, n.: a Rastafarian proctologist.

14. oyster, n.: a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.

15. Frisbeetarianism, n.: the belief that, after death, the soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.

16. circumvent, n.: an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.

P.S. Actually, this is Ana's contribution. Thank you Ana!

Let it snow, Let it snow

What is this? The second or third snow storm of the year? I say: Bring It On!

The best thing to do is to turn on the fake logfire in your fake fireplace and have tea and scones while reading Madame Bovary and listening to Shubert. Unless of course, like me, you have to frigging brave the frigging cold, wind and snow to frigging show up at the frigging office, cause there's a frigging deadline and you've got to absolutely, positively finish translating that frigging document or else !!!%%(?&$!!!!

The bus was late, I had to take a taxi

And then Bernouille pushed me into a puddle, the bast*rd!

But if you don't have to go to work, you could start knitting a sweater for that poor tree in front of the house. The pattern is here:

Thursday, March 01, 2007

Thousand Hand Kwan Yin

Borrowed indirectly from Cynical C Blog, this is a video of a show performed by deaf and mute Chinese dancers.